Sticks & Stones Shitty Interview No.107

The Beefs

by: Ainsley Hutchence

11 Illustrated answers, photos & track
Interviewee: The Beefs / Interviewer: Sticks and Stones

Sticks & Stones Shitty Interview No.107

Some readers might quite literally need a translator for this Aussie interview if you’re not down with the lingo, it gives one of the most honest insights into ‘Australiana’. At first glance you might reckon THE BEEFS is just a kick-ass Instagram page bustling with Australian images, showcasing the endless beauties of our gorgeous land. But trust me, it’s way more than that. It’s an explosion of art, an embodiment of soundscapes crafted by none other than South Australian treasure Sammy Smith, compiled with the help of homegrown music talent Matt Corby, Kirin J Callinan & Julian Sudek. As if that didn’t sell you enough, local titans Monty from DELTA RIGGS & Brock Fitzgerald of WOLF & CUB fame are joining as part of the live act. There’s literally enough talent & rowdiness in this beauty of a group to blast you off into Aussie heaven. THE BEEFS have definitely got their finger on the cultural pulse & are banging that bad boy on all cylinders in the new tunes as a result, most recently their latest zinger ‘Red Bellied Black Snake’. Featuring Kirin J Callinan & mixed by George Georgiadis (Skeggs, Tyne James Organ, Pist Idiots), the tune is an overflow of everything to love about Aussie music & the homegrown way of life. It’s a proper killer at 170bpm as well, perfect to get the heart racing quick enough to run a bloody marathon twice over, giving the glorious middle finger to all you pass on the way. Seriously, those mind-bending guitars will shake your soul alive with the embers of insanity, all the while soothing you with those enchanting as fuck vocals.

Listen to RED BELLIED BLACK SNAKE on Spotify here

Follow THE BEEFS on Spotify here

Press photos by Andy Myers & screenshots from @the.beefs

Sticks & Stones: What defines an icon?
The Beefs: Icons are locals to their born environment. Whether a person or a statue or an animal, or a statue of an animal or a person. An icon can’t exist without a backdrop.

Sticks & Stones: Best pub in Australia?
The Beefs: Fuck me dry tough question! Been to a couple of corkers. For music the Espy in Melbourne. For the view that one in Yamba The Pacific. For uniqueness the pub at Wallaby Island Abroholos Islands.

Sticks & Stones: What are the fundamental features of a beautiful mullet?
The Beefs: Something you can tie in a bun or one you can wash on the run. One that’ll block the sun or one that’ll find ya some fun. A good male mullet carries some stigma, whilst a modern female one is almost an enigma.

Sticks & Stones: Ford or Holden panel vans?
The Beefs: Can’t go past a Sandman. Ain’t nothin’ like the back of a Holden panno whilst ya gettin’ ya Rodney rinsed or there’s a spiky red fringe bobbin’ up & down between you & the steering wheel on a Sunday drive.

Sticks & Stones: We’ve got the big prawn, pineapple & banana, what are we missing?
The Beefs: My hometown Port Lincoln has long been the home of the Southern Bluefin Tuna. Why the fuck isn’t a giant silver torpedo with gills plastered up at the entrance to the town? I’ll never know.

Sticks & Stones: Last time you felt embarrassed?
The Beefs: I had to cook a pancake on live television & I saw in the Facebook comments for the show that a lady had written. “I wouldn’t eat anything that arrogant cunt cooked for me”

Sticks & Stones: What does the perfect day look like to you?
The Beefs: Wake up, kiss me baby on the scone & paddle out to a pumping empty beach break. 11 o’clock rolls around & I’m two schooners before nooners.

Sticks & Stones: Last time you committed a crime?
The Beefs: I apologised for not flushing the toilet after my morning coffee grogan.

Sticks & Stones: What makes a good Australian?
The Beefs: The good Aussie is polite & well mannered. He’s patient & understanding. He is tolerant of anything different to himself. She’s an exquisite lover with sun-struck locks. She loves the outback as much as she loves the beach.

Sticks & Stones: What’s the best Australian slang?
The Beefs: Grab ya china plates & fang down the local for a couple cheekies off the wood cobba. Hop in me uterus & hit the maino fishin’ chip for a couple unidentified frying objects. Grab the cheese & kissed & show her where the dust blows off the turtles back.



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